I am actually aware of a few quirks in Boquete, so I should have avoided this social blunder.
But I didn't.
When I was at the the gym, an acquaintance walked in. He had a little, year-old boy with him that looked Panamanian. He is about 75.
So I asked him if the boy was his grandson and he said, a little indignantly, no this is my son.
Whoops!
There are more than a few old gringos who marry young Panamanian women and have babies when they are in their 70's and sometimes 80's.
This is not a good idea for many reasons but it happens with alarming frequency.
There is the age issue and the fact that the gringo will not be around for the majority of the child's formative life and will not see the kid marry.
But there is another cultural issue that rarely gets considered in the "heat" of the moment.
When a gringo is considered wealthy...believe me, most gringos are wealthy in the eyes of Panamanians...they are expected to support the entire extended family...dozens of brothers, sisters, parents, cousins and on and on. Normally 30 to 60 people.
This of course does not occur to the starry eyed, horny gringo. Even though they appear to be intelligent, successful men...judges, district attorneys, airline captains and others.
But believe me it occurs to the young lady and her parents!
Families in Panama are extensive and close, frequently living in adjacent houses with more than one family unit in each house...crowded by our standards but completely normal to them.
They will be a little bit better off financially after the marriage of their daughter to the fossil-bait, old codger.
So, there will be a few young children without their gringo father running around this community in the future.
But, I didn't have to make the social mistake and rub it in this guys face.
2 comments:
Loved this blog from the time I saw the title! The thing with Latins is that the same thing works in reverse. back in the early 70's a Mexican adopted me as his brother. he would find me passed out in the street or some place downtown, and he would carry me home to his house. One time, he had a sacristy built for his dead grandma. she had given him a bottle of Mescal for his 21st birthday, and he took a shot every year on his birthday (he was about 28, maybe). I got up in the middle of the night and drank it all. He asked me if I did, and I hung my head and said 'yes.' Still, the next time he found me, and every time till I quit, he would carry me home to his casa (he had a family). Manuel was his name. I never saw him again after I quit drinking. Once I saw his van, but couldn't find him. Loved him with all my Heart, though. Still do, if he's alive. Love You, Darshan
Great story! And you are right, there is a lot more to the Latin culture than gold-bricking.
The other aspect of the strong extended family is the closeness and automatic community of helping when someone needs it. Really, the expectation for the gringo's money is an extension of that...and with a little greed thrown in...but what would any culture be without some greed!
Love ya, Tom
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