The On Going Saga of the Never Ending House

If I could spin a yarn as adroitly as my builder, I would be a muti-millionaire novelist with an international following.  

This guy can change a story faster than Tricky Dick in 1972, faster that a politician, well, with his mouth moving, faster that "W" justifying a war, and faster than Dick Cheney explaining that water boarding is simply a party game, faster than Obama extinguishing a cigarette when the cameras are on, faster than Focus on the Family disavowing Ted Haggard when the manure hit the ventilator...you get the idea.

If I tried to diagram the story line about my house, I would have sprained both wrists and have writers cramps in my fingers.  

Let it be said that I have no idea what is going on, what happen, much less what is going to happen.  Just keep me in the dark and feed me bullshit.

He failed the final Bomber's inspection last week.  To his credit, he had 2 guys...count them...2 guys working on my house for 2 days.  That is a record over the last 5 months.  (I have averaged 4 hours of work for 1 guy each week--lucky me!)  He was busy correcting the deficiencies in the inspection.  And, they actually have some building codes here that make sense.  I do know that most inspections are failed the first time so deficiencies don't bother me.  The rest of the story is what bothers me.

My problem is that I thought the inspection was done weeks ago.  Silly me!  I know he told me it was done, he stacked several stories on top of each other to validate that it was done, he blamed the paperwork delays on the Bomber's administration, his sick horse, his broken truck, his cabinet maker cutting off a finger (which was not true although he did take a good chunk out of finger), and anything else within the reach of his agile and creative mind.

But, in the end, it wasn't done until last Friday.

The only way I found out was dropping by my house and seeing 2 guys doing things that were not expected, like actually being there and working!

I started to ask him when the paperwork would be done, but I stopped...what's the use.  All I ever get is bullshit.  I had to buy a new pair of boots, waist high hip waders, just to stay out of it.

Well, in all this upset, wouldn't you know it...

I GOT MY FINAL BOMBER'S PAPERWORK TODAY!!!

Will wonders never cease.  I can't even celebrate.  The journey has been too long and arduous.  I am plain old tuckered out.

Tomorrow I go to Union Fenosa and try to submit the paperwork for the electric.  You can relax, I don't actually expect to have everything.  I know I will have to go back um tine times but it will be in my court under my control.

Wish me luck, would ya.